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“If you choose to (continue that behavior), you choose to (receive whatever consequence has already been established as a punishment)”.You might say, “Erin, if you choose to poke your sister again, you choose to not watch TV for the rest of the day”.Of course, there will be times when a task must be completed in a certain fashion (homework, etc.).However, many times we force kids to do something the “right way”, when it could have been done in several ways.
A kid can sit down on a chair facing the back, and we make them turn around.When I think about all of the phrases, anecdotes, and sayings about the power of the spoken word I am reminded of how I changed my way of communicating with children upon learning Play Therapy principles.I realize that using Play Therapy based language is a learned and practiced skill that requires time and effort, so I thought it would be helpful to share ten commonly used phrases parents say to their kids.First, you are threatening a child, which makes them fearful of you.
Second, the threat is usually not something that is feasible to do (we are going home, you are going straight to bed, you don’t get dinner, you are grounded for a week, etc.) What we say in frustration is not only impractical but easily forgettable. You can train yourself to be clear and concise, using choices.
You can always rephrase the sentence from a negative to a positive, which will correct the behavior without sounding critical.